The dopamine trap and how pain can set you free

It's the neurotransmitter Dopamine that's partly responsible for the pleasure feelings we get.  What gives you pleasure? These are your sources of dopamine. 

It's not the fact that you’re getting dopamine that's bad – we all need dopamine! What today’s Blog is about, is considering the source and the cost of it.

Let’s quickly map out the lay of dopamine land:  The drive to feel good is natural. It’s what caused us to leave the comfort of the cave and seek food and resources. The anticipation of getting a hit of dopamine - at finding something to eat during a forage - is half the pleasure! Then the hit of dopamine.

Occasionally I'll buy a puzzle to do with the youngest member of my family.  I often end up doing it mostly by myself and as I enjoy being in my "nothing box" (no phones, being in the flow...) I realised that with every puzzle piece I found, I'd get a tiny little glow of pleasure.  

I’ve been on a journey of breaking up with sugar because I no longer want to rely on dopamine via sugar to feel good - and I want the health benefits too. 

Confession incoming: This is no small matter for me. It’s taken me years of breaking up with other things like coffee and potato chips to build up the confidence to feel like I might have what it takes to conquer sugar. I learnt about sugar early on forays to my grandparents' lolly cabinet, being sent home with a family-size pack after our weekly dinner together, and the burden of gifts loaded with chocolate bars equalling total overwhelm. I just didn't have the skills to manage it. Such is the grip that sugar has had on me, I’d ruminate about sugar: when/what/how will I get my next fix. Can you relate to having a pleasurable activity that you realise you obsess over? It signalled to me that it wasn't a healthy relationship.  Is there an activity where a little break makes you feel edgy? How many times have you picked up your phone to look at it today?

The dopamine seesaw - what goes up must come down.

Because our body’s systems are always working to keep itself balanced (homeostasis) your body reacts to the dopamine to bring it back to “neutral”. Therefore, the bigger the dopamine hit, the more counterbalancing that’s required. A big dopamine spike induces a big reaction to counterbalance, which sends you into a big deficit which then drives an urge for another dopamine hit. The bigger the thrill, the more bitter the pill.

The first hit is the most pleasurable, and all hits following this decrease in pleasurability. Think about your favourite meal and that first bite – such bliss! It makes you want to keep eating because it’s so good, and to be fair you might be genuinely hungry. But in terms of pleasure, each bite of that meal becomes less satisfying. It would therefore make sense that if your favourite meal was in some way forbidden, you could technically eat just one bite and get the most pleasure but who does that?

This drive to continue to feel pleasure is what causes you to overconsume.

The ways people can overconsume are countless and have variable degrees of social acceptability. In Aotearoa, it’s socially acceptable to overconsume work with some people boasting they like to “work hard and play hard”. Another is the overconsumption of physical activity. Overconsumption is what leads to the reliance on that activity, which then can cause a person to feel that they’re addicted to it.  When the cost of feeling good comes at the expense of relationships, health and your integrity, it's time to look at change.

Your hedonistic activity requires more each time because of the seesaw and your body’s constant desire to create balance. Eventually, it can lead to anhedonia – your inability to feel pleasure from the pleasurable activity. This explains why people find themselves scrolling and scrolling on social media but not getting the pleasure they once did.

The “department” of your brain that responds to dopamine to make you feel good also processes pain: pleasure and pain have an inverse connection. Therefore the more pleasure you seek, the more pain you will feel. An extreme example of this is when people use recreational drugs to feel good and then feel awful when they’ve "come down". The good news is that activities that cause pain can lead to pleasure. One example of using a painful activity to feel good is cold water therapy. The “pain” of being in cold water causes your body to counterbalance itself, causing a flood of dopamine.

Any behaviour that gives you pleasure or pain can be overconsumed.  But they're not all equal.  Do you ruminate over the next time you’re going to eat broccoli? I didn’t think so!  But what are the habits you have that lead you to "overconsume"? Maybe it’s time to make a change.

When stuck in a cycle of overconsumption, abstinence can be a path to break away and reset. Abstinence has been used for a long time, particularly within religions, to find balance and clarity. Digital detoxes and dry July are popular modern ways to abstain.  I abstained from sugar for at least 4 months before touching sugar (an absolute miracle). I have a long way to go but I grow confident with each week.  

Use self-regulation (rules) to moderate your consumption, avoiding extremes and overconsumption. Examples could be to only drink one cup of coffee per day or only put the TV on two nights a week.

Choose gentle ups and downs for every day. When you choose gentle dopamine hits (like a puzzle), they will all feel good. Save the feeling of getting a big high for infrequent occasions – that way you’ll not become desensitised to the thrill.

Spread your sources of pleasure. Instead of reaching for sugar during your mid-afternoon slump, try a little burst of something aromatic like perfume, aromatherapy oil or fresh air.

HERE'S THE SQUEEZE

Trying to avoid pain can lead you to overconsume the things that give you pleasure. One of the most common things we do, is that we a) expect life to be pain-free b) we do everything we can to eliminate all pain from our life.

The best thing you can do for yourself is accept that pain is part of life, and learn how to not resist it. Life will bring heartbreak, grief and loss, sadness, embarrassment and shame. By developing your willingness to witness yourself as you feel these feelings, you negate the need to medicate yourself through life. It’s possible to feel the most painful things and come through the other side.  That's when you'll know you're free to experience the full range of life.

Mauri ora / behold the sneeze of life,